at what age in california can a child refuse to visit non custodial parent

Dara Isaacson

As a family lawyer, one of the about mutual questions that I get asked by my clients is what their obligations are when their child or children do non desire to spend time with the other parent when the parents have separated. This is particularly apropos for parents when there are Court Orders in place which provide for the child to spend time with the parents.

When faced with these issues one of the first questions that I enquire is, what indicates to y'all that child X (allow'southward telephone call him Lachlan for the purposes of this hypothetical) doesn't want to go? The responses that I get run the gamut of 'Lachlan screams and cries and says he doesn't desire to go'; 'when it is time for handover Lachlan runs into his room and locks the door'; 'when Lachlan returns from the visit he says that he never wants to run into her/him once more'.

Manifestly, this is 1 of the most distressing things that separated parents tin go through, and so they demand good sound advice, both from a legal and practical point of view. And in truth, the reply is not always straightforward.

This exact consequence arose in the recently decided case ofCartland & Cartland.This was a case where a single Estimate (Judge Terry) of the Federal Circuit Court, was asked to consider whether a mother had contravened Court Orders whereby the Orders provided that the children were to spend fourth dimension with the father. On each occasion, the mother brought the children (anile 11 and 12) to the place of handover equally stipulated in the Court Orders, but sat silently by as the children, from the backseat of her motorcar with the window rolled downwardly, told the male parent that they did not want to spend fourth dimension with him. On each occasion that this occurred the mother drove off with the children and the visit with the father did not get ahead. The father sought an gild from the Courtroom that the mother was in contravention of the Court Orders.

It is not considered a contravention of Courtroom Orders if the party who is alleged to accept contravened has a reasonable excuse for declining to comply with the Court Orders. In the example of the mother argued that she had complied with her obligations pursuant to the Court Orders past bringing the children to the handover place, still the children expressed that they did non want to go spend time with their father, therefore she had a reasonable alibi for the visit not going ahead equally per the Court Orders. She reasoned that subsequently all she couldn't force the children to go with their male parent confronting their wishes, right?

The Court was quite disquisitional of the mother's behaviour. It institute that the mother'southward behaviour was sending the bulletin to the children that information technology was fine for them to remain in the motorcar and turn down to go with the father. In order not to be in breach of the Court orders it was incumbent upon the female parent to make a reasonable effort and accept positive steps to bring about some change in the attitude and wishes of the children.

Of grade the circumstances of every example are different and factors such equally the children'southward age and maturity level; history of the proceedings; history of family unit violence etc are all relevant to whether or not a person will be found to have contravened orders that provide for one parent to spend fourth dimension with the kid in circumstances where that person is bringing the child to handover just doing nothing more to facilitate the visit going ahead.

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You lot can aid provide a safe cyberspace for unmarried mothers and their children in their time of about astute need.

Nevertheless, as a rule of pollex for parents in this state of affairs who want to know if they could be found to be in alienation of Court Orders without a reasonable excuse, the following may serve equally a guide for what they need to do:

1. You do have to physically take the kid to the place of handover as ordered past the Court.
2. Information technology is not enough to only take the child to handover. If the child says they do not want to go, you take a positive obligation to encourage the kid to spend time with the other parent. Such encouragement tin have the form of:
   1. saying to the child that they will accept fun with the other parent before they go;
   2. Sending the message (both by your trunk linguistic communication and the things you say) that you lot are supportive of the kid spending time with the other parent;
   3. At the end of the visit, talking with the child about what the child did with the other parent and raising positive points about that feel. (e.thou. 'you lot went to the zoo with Dad? That'due south great! What animals did you see?')
3. Item 1 and two demand to be done on a regular basis. Non but as a i-off.

After implementing these strategies on a few occasions, hopefully, your child will be more willing to spend time with the other parent. That volition certainly make things easier for the child and on you every bit their parent! However, if later taking these steps you are yet facing a child who adamantly does non want to spend time with the other parent and that contact does non go alee, at least you will likely be better placed to argue that y'all had a reasonable excuse for contravening the Court Orders, than would be the case if you were the mother in the case that we considered above who did nothing more than drive the children to the handover place and sit silently as they expressed their wish not to become with their male parent.

Of course, this blog comes with a disclaimer, if y'all believe that your child'southward safety and well being are at adventure by spending time with the other parent, fifty-fifty when there are Court Orders in place and then in the first instance you need to seek legal advice about what your options are. If this is an issue that you are facing we recommend making an engagement with a lawyer right away.

Dara Isaacson is a Melbourne based Family Lawyer.

This commodity has been republished with permission.

Epitome COURTESY OF FRANCISCO OSORIO FLICKR CC

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Source: https://www.csmc.org.au/2015/07/my-child-doesnt-want-to-go-to-visitation-with-the-other-parent-do-i-have-to-force-him/

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